Another wild and crazy day :(

Today we faced a new issue. Gary has had times when he has been out of sorts before but full on hallucinations that is new. Heading to work this morning he seemed out of sorts I really didn't think much of it because I woke him up and when you wake me up I get out of sorts. I began to get a little worried as I got updates from my Mom he was throwing his remotes on the floor tossing his blankets just doing some weird stuff. When I got home I went in his room and the items on his table were scattered all over the floor and his sheets were in a ball at the side of his bed and he was batting the air, mumbling and air walking. Needless to say that alarmed me enough to call the Hospice nurse. She came by within a half an hour, she took his BP and His oxygen and observed him for a while and she seems to think he was feeling really bad in the middle of the night and probably took to many of the anti nausea meds to close together and he had to sleep it off. We took ALL his meds away from him and began "operation daddy check". We all took turns checking on him and recovering him. Thankfully tonight he seemed to begin to come around a little. He was actually a little irritated that we moved his meds and his remotes but we told him moving the meds was nurses orders and moving the remotes well that is our safety we didn't want to get a remote pitched at us when we came in. He is back asleep now I pray he sleeps peacefully and wakes up tomorrow back to his old self. Days like today scare me to DEATH. I worry about him so much and it just kills me watching the girls react to days like this. Merry especially she helped me a lot today and witnessed more of Daddy's loopiness than the other girls and I noticed her this afternoon sitting in His room quiet and she was holding her American Girl Doll and just crying. I don't know what is worse seeing the love of my life suffer like today or watch these precious babies watch their Daddy go thru all this. I hate that they are versed in the names of Chemo and all the terminology that goes with Cancer. I always took great pride in sheltering them from the world and allowing him to just be kids then Cancer invaded and they have had to grow up alot in a short amount of time. They have been amazingly strong I remember when my dad was ill and passed away my adult sisters and I had some real issues how in the heck do these young ones deal with this. Sometimes they don't and drive me even more crazy than I all ready am but I couldn't make it with out my girls and my Mom and all my friends I am so very blessed. A catch phrase in "the church" is too blessed to be stressed well I am so very blessed but still stressed but thankfully serve an amazing God that understands and loves me anyway :)
Tonight Merry tripped and fell on her bed and broke her bed frame we took the frame to the trash and put her bed on the floor and she just collapsed on the bed and said I wish it was October. Naturally I thought that being her birth month I figured it was a longing sigh for what she wants for her birthday( Kananni the AG Doll) but she said "no well finally holding Kannani will be magic but by then Daddy will be done with chemo and his cancer will be gone and he will be old daddy again" (insert knife deep into my heart) Sigh these poor girls how do you handle this at 10, 12 and 14 I dunno :(
I guess we will do all we can do and put one foot in front of the other count our blessings and trust God with the rest. Thank you for your continued prayers....