A wonderful dream

Last night I had the most realistic dreams I have ever had I was sitting next to Gary laughing and snuggling we talked and he made me belly laugh like he always was able to do. When I woke up I was going to go and kiss Gary on the forehead and let him know he was in my dreams all night long. It took about two minutes to realize that he is not here anymore and my heart hurt like it did the night he died. I wanted to sit and cry for a few minutes but unfortunately I had slept through my first alarm and was waking up to my "oh crap" alarm. My middle daughter had orientation for 7th grade this morning and that made me sad too because if Gary was here he would have taken off work to be there for us. He would have sat in between us and held both of our hands he would have nudged me in the ribs when things were going long and I was about to doze off. My middle daughter busted out into sobs several times going and coming back she just kept saying "I miss Daddy I know he would be so proud of me". She is so excited about the new challenges of the new school year but is fears doing it all with out our Daddy :( It has only been two weeks sometimes it seems like it has been a year since he was gone and other times it seems like it all just happened. As we begin this new season of hundreds of "firsts" without daddy every time we have one of those firsts it is like ripping a band aide off a scar on a hairy arm and them pouring some salt in it. Thank you for your prayers all of Gary's family appreciates them.