It has been a VERY long couple of weeks. Thank the Lord there has not been anymore hospital stays. He has felt really awful lately and has been in bed the majority of the time. Fortunately that changed after he had to miss Cassie's birthday dinner. It is a tradition on each persons birthday we go as a family either out to eat or cook something special well Cassie's Birthday was on Wednesday and he felt to weak to go with us out to eat. While we were gone he sat in bed and was racked with sobs he felt so bad about missing dinner. When we were out to eat Cassie passed me the note pictured it made me cry so of course I posted it on my facebook page. When we got home I told him not to look at the pic so of course as all good little boys he looked at it and the sobs started again. We ended up being up till 4 am talking and crying and he just sobbed that he has lost what ever life he had left and it was killing him. The next day Gary woke up 180 degrees different he came into our room and sat with us ,school work with us, watched TV and played with the girls it was like a light turned on. The next day was the same and on Saturday I was the proudest of him that I had been in a long while. He mustard up the strength to go to Target and order Merry's (the second October bday) Bday cake and pick up some prescriptions he rode in a little cart and even rode over and looked at video games. He came home with the biggest smile on his face. It is funny how much we take for granted in life but that simple trip to Target made him feel alive again. On Sunday he started to feel bad again but he was determined not to miss another birthday dinner and he didn't God Love him he felt lower than a snakes belly in a wagon rutt but he did it and it made Merry so happy she was BEAMING sitting next to her daddy and it made all our days. We have a challenging week this week a couple of dr apts and some new meds I have to learn how to give him and a pet scan that will let us know if the chemo is working and what the next treatment step will be if any. We also have the holidays coming up and I know this will be a challenge on many levels for our family not only to make it special but the finances to do so (medical bills are pretty big). God had shown himself so amazing this month we were blessed with a couple of weeks of meals a few restaurant gift cards a new bed (ours was long broken) and a new water heater to replace the one that broke on us.God never ceases to amaze me when I break into a panic about stuff which I do more than I should God just quietly provides in ways I would never imagine. The other day going to the Doctoro Gary was feeling so bad I thought for sure we were headed to the hospital I sat in the drivers seat and prayed God let me know if a hospital stay is in our future if he will avoid the hospital let the next song be a Davis Crowder Band song ( I know using fleeces like Gideon did is not what a mature Christian would do but I was desperate). When we got to the doctor they took one look at him and put him in a wheel chair and wheeled him right back to an exam room where he proceeded to get sick and I was so defeated I thought there is no way they are not going to hospitalize him but they said his blood counts were ok but he was dehydrated and gave him fluids and he felt better and we went home. God used that time to remind me when HE tells me something I need to have faith in HIM that he will follow thru with what He promised.

This week Lord remind me to listen to the words that you have spoken over this family and help me have the faith to believe you for everything and thank you Lord for always finding new ways to suprise me with your blessings you are a great daddy :)